June 06, 2003 - 5:08 p.m.
Bite thy tongue!
Everyone knows you've got to love yourself fully before you can love anyone else.
I think we all need to go a step further, and in a slightly different direction: You need to trust yourself fully before you can expect anyone else to trust you.
You have to know what you want and what you don't want, without a doubt, if you want someone else to believe in you. And you have to trust yourself to be true to what it is that you want. If you're wishy-washy with yourself, don't you dare get huffy when someone else is unsure about you.
First, know what you want before you get involved with someone! Shit!
I had a boyfriend ask me to marry him, but as a hypothetical question. What the fuck is that? He held me in his arms, and whispered over my shoulder,"What would you say if I asked you to marry me?" How the hell was I supposed to respond? He didn't seem to like my answer, "I dunno - guess we'll have to wait and see when it happens..." See, I turned his game back over to him. (He had already put a ring on my finger before this incident - the ring his dad made him when he was a kid... what a headcase.)
Three months later, we broke up, he moved out, and in with another chick. (hmmm, they may even be married now.) When I asked him about the whole proposal thing, he said, "well, I had to test out the idea - see if it felt right." Yuck. Can people please learn to think with their mouths closed?
