January 12, 2003 - 7:36 p.m.
I'm a fool
Maybe i am just lashing out. But maybe not. I send messages this weekend... I need a hug, wish you were here, I miss you...
And he's been sick, or busy, or whatever... No response, whatsoever... And tonight I tell him that I'm disappointed, and he says he doesn't know why... I tell him again what I've been needing, and he says "it's good of you to tell me." But then nothing again. What's so good about telling someone what you need if they're unable or unwilling to give?
He says it seems like I'm trying to punish him, but that's how I felt...
And still, here I am, without a hug.
I'm searching for reasons not
to run away forever.
Finding none,
I blame everyone,
Then myself.
